Monday, 22 August 2011

Reasons to be less un-cheerful (and sorry about the last posting)



  • We have our first hedgehog in the garden. Is it because I’ve abandoned the flower-beds to nature this year (through lack of time/energy/inclination)?

  • The blackberries are ripening and I can feast on them as I walk Dog.

  • Dog is much better behaved these days. Almost her only vice is jumping up at people.

  • We’ve booked a holiday for next year (and blow bank balance, carbon footprint etc etc).

But I’m still stuck on The Novel.


And here are some pictures of Pembrokeshire.




Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Reasons to be un-cheerful OR Why I feel sad today

  • I’m just back from a week’s holiday on the glorious Pembrokeshire coast where a fox sat unafraid for several minutes and watched my sister and me walk past and bats lived in the roof-space of the cottage we were renting and I just missed seeing a dolphin.
  • The Novel has died on me.
  • I’ve put on at least half a stone since this time last year and look awful in at least half my clothes.
  • We’re still degrading the environment and I’m still contributing to that degradation simply by virtue of existing.
  • My 83-year-old mother is not well and I live four hours’ drive away from her.
  • The summer is coming to an end.
  • I'm still me.
  • This programme puts in bullet marks where they're not needed and now won't let me put in an extra line spaces.
Sorry! I'll be all right tomorrow.

Wednesday, 3 August 2011

A person of small brain

Apologies for my absence. I’ve been trying to work on The Novel and, as I’ve said before, I’m a person of small brain and can only do one thing at a time.

I hope to get back to you in a couple of weeks.

Monday, 25 July 2011

Auras Actually

‘Could you do us three thousand words on “wellness”?’ said the voice on the phone.
    In an attempt to cure my migraines, I’d tried just about every therapy you could think of. I was becoming something of an expert and made a living writing about complementary health for encyclopaedias and part-works (books issued in magazine-like instalments).
    I thought I knew it all. I ate properly and exercised. I relaxed with yoga. I didn’t smoke. I drank alcohol in moderation. I’d spent three years with a counsellor and hypnotherapist sorting out emotions from the past and learning to deal with uncomfortable emotions (like anger) in the present – something no one had ever taught me before. Frog and I were aware that we still had lots to learn about living together but at least we didn’t get stuck in those terrible arguments when all we wanted to do was grab the other one by the throat and strangle them – not quite so often anyway.
    It was six months since we’d lost our baby. I’d spent several months crying and then another few months where I’d been taken over by fantasies and veered off in strange directions (another story) but now I was OK again.
    I was slightly daunted however by the assignment. The subject was vaguer than I was used to. I decided to start thinking about it by dividing wellness into four categories – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. I then listed under each category what you could do for yourself and what therapies you could use. All well and good until I got to the last category: the spiritual. I realised, to my horror, that while I knew lots about spiritual paths and practices I used absolutely none of them in my daily life. My life appeared to be devoid of a spiritual dimension.
    I did nothing about the insight of course and carried on as normal.
    Six months later, as I have described in ‘The Fool’ (February), a friend introduced me to Cheryl. Cheryl was sketching aura-portraits and, rather nervously, I agreed to let her do one for me.
    The aura, I knew, was the energy field around the body, visible to some people. Some scientific research had been done into the phenomenon but on the whole it was lumped in with telepathy, mediumship, fortune-telling, and all the rest of that psychic nonsense. Not that that was what I thought about auras. I’d seen, heard and felt some strange things myself - but I didn’t know what to make of them.
    ‘You get headaches,’ said Cheryl, picking up a black crayon and smudging it over one side of the head of the human-figure outline on her paper.
    I nodded. I wasn’t that impressed. Most people got headaches.
    Then she began smudging black all over the figure’s solar plexus.
    ‘You’ve got a serious blockage here,’ she said. ‘You must do something about it or you’ll be ill.’
    I gulped. ‘What can I do?’
    ‘Do you meditate?’ she asked.
    I shook my head.
    Around the top half of the figure she coloured a purple hoop, but around the bottom she did a brown one.
   


    She pointed to the brown.
    ‘See this,’ she said. ‘This is not good. Your spirituality is not connected to the rest of your life.’   
    By now I was riveted. She spoke with total certainty. I just knew that she could help me.
    ‘How do I connect it?’ I asked.
    Cheryl thought for a while.
    ‘Giving,’ she said.
    As I have described, that was the beginning of my crash-course in spiritual practice.
    A year later Cheryl did me another aura-portrait. It was beautiful. Instead of being restricted to a small area around the body, the colours stretched to the edge of the page. All my favourites were there – pink, purple, emerald green, turquoise. There were still black patches but they had moved. The brown had vanished.


    A year after that I wasn’t seeing Cheryl quite so often any more but she agreed to take part in a ‘Day of Healing’ - therapy taster sessions – that a group of us was organising in the village and where I was doing my tarot-reading.
    I was meditating every day now and in my meditations I had the sensation that two angels were standing behind me with their hands on my shoulders. They gave me a lot of comfort, and strength.
    ‘Can I do you an aura-portrait as a warm-up,’ Cheryl asked me, ‘while we wait for people to arrive?’
    This time, there were no blockages. Golden-yellow ringed the aura and flared from the figure's back like wings.
    ‘There’s an angel behind you,’ said Cheryl.




Cheryl unfortunately burnt out (so there's no point ringing the telephone numbers on the aura-portraits). She became very successful very quickly. Everyone wanted her to sort their lives out. People were ringing her day and night. She married, moved away and found a job with the Post Office.


And, yes, I found the aura file eventually, not where I had expected it but under 'C' for Cheryl in the box of material I used when I wrote an autobiography a few years ago.

Friday, 22 July 2011

A room of one's own

Continuing with the narcissistic theme (and because I still can’t find my blinking aura file), I thought I’d show you a couple of pictures of the house.
    When Frog went self-employed eighteen years ago, his tools and equipment already filled a garage, a shed, the driveway, a bedroom and half the sitting-room. Now we had the contents of his workshop at the university to accommodate as well. I meanwhile was also self-employed and used one of the bedrooms in our two-and-a-half-bedroomed bungalow as my study. The dog’s bed took up most of our tiny galley kitchen. Things were becoming a tad cramped.
    We didn’t want to move as we had good neighbours and were well dug into the village so instead we turned to our friend Miles, a designer and builder (www.housedesigndevon.co.uk ).
    ‘I’d like a tower to work in and a big kitchen,’ I said.
    ‘I’d like a cave,’ said Frog, ‘to use as a music studio.’
    Well, thanks to Miles and his wild (sometimes too wild) imagination, that’s just about what we got.
    Our bungalow now has four levels.
    Frog has a semi-underground room with sound-proofing in the ceiling and non-right-angled corners (better for sound-recording). He keeps the blinds closed and the window shut. Here it is.







    And I have a room carved out of the loft:



Here is my sewing corner in the room, and the glass walls looking into the conservatory that connects the old and the new parts of the house:



and here are my lovely Velux windows:



Because I'm not very clever with photographs, I've managed to make the room look dark, but that's just what it isn't.
    (And, as you can see, I'm not so minimalist after all, in a space that's all mine. . .)